Review this.

Happy Thursday friends! Our weekend was a very quiet one, if you follow me on Instagram you would have seen my new attempt at a geometric pattern nail art, my thighs got burnt to a crisp sitting by the pool reading my new book (oops, I missed a spot with the ole sunblock) and the Mr. and I are a little under the weather, hence my lack of posts this week. I guess this week was not a total disaster as on Monday I experienced my first Arizona dust storm so I had the perfect excuse to stay inside, rest my sunburn and my head.

I finished reading the latest book "The Lords of Salem" By Rob Zombie with B.K Evenson. Let me preface this by saying that this book is not for the faint of heart. I'm a horror movie fan myself and am a fan of Rob Zombie, be it his music or his incredibly gory films. Even though you can hear me screaming from my couch or occasionally peeping at the TV through my fingers that are carefully placed over my eyes there is something about the horror/gore/scary genre that gets my heart racing and blood pumping. It also helps that I am married to a massive horror movie buff.

When it comes to books however, I'm a bit more of a wuss. I never read horror books! The scariest book I ever read was "Kiss the Girls" By James Patterson. I guess I feel like my imagination scares me a lot more than Hollywood can, I enjoy reading books as they are just words on a piece of paper (or screen if you have become a traitor to the written word like myself). Books leave a whole lot up for interpretation and I guess that is why I love to read, it gives you a chance to really use your imagination. Rob Zombie scared the pants off me in this book, I had to put it down in a few places as there really are some quite graphic scenes in this book, which will be coming to your local theater in approx a week or so!

The stories beginnings are based on the Salem witch trials back in 1692, Reverend John Hawthorne and Judge Samuel Mather encounter a horrid satanic ritual taking place, quickly confront the witches and immediately begin an execution. This leads to a curse being placed on the decedents of all the men whom burnt these witches at the stake that night. Come to present day when we find our leading lady Heidi Hawthorne (played by none other than Zombie's muse and wife Sheri Moon Zombie in the film) decedent of Rev. John Hawthorne, former drug addict, night time DJ at the local radio station and typical rock snob loner. When a mysterious wooden box with a curious symbol carved into it appears addressed to Heidi, things start to get a little out of hand. A band by the name of "The Lords" have sent Heidi their latest record to be played and to put it lightly have got all the women in town going crazier than a mob of 14 year old girls at a OneDirection concert. A string of gruesome deaths ensue with their female attackers left confused and branded with the same strange symbol as on the box, things just go from bad to worse.

This book does it have some light hearted moments with Heidi's two DJ side kicks Herman and Herman "Whitey" poke fun at the Norwegian black metal genre and keep up with the whole Salem Witch charade to satiate their bosses and the Salem public. It does offer some historical accuracies and some very intense murder scenes, which are not every ones cup of tea, let's face it but is what Rob Zombie does best, scare the crap out of his audience. It was an easy read, well written and easy to follow. I am not convinced that I will be reading anymore horror books in the near future, I think I may just leave this kind of thing for my couch and my snuggle buddy.